At The Altar.
Sacrifice is an interesting word. The etymological meaning of the word is this “to make sacred”. This definition can help us to understand exactly what we hold to be most valuable in our life. Most of the time when we here the word sacrifice we think of heroes, soldiers or martyrs. We imagine someone giving up something valuable for something they believe to be greater than themselves. But sacrifice is not only for heroes and extraordinary people. We all sacrifice to a degree. Every decision we make requires leaving another decision behind.
Every person hopes that their sacrifice will not be in vain. We want to believe that if we give, sacrifice, suffer enough, that something great will come from it. But there is no certainty in sacrifice. If there was the world would transcend at an astronomical pace. There is always a risk that your sacrifice will not be the result of what you originally hoped for.
If the return were guaranteed it would not be much of a sacrifice.
Sacrifice is the willful surrender of something you hold valuable.
The Stoic would say to not become a slave to what destiny can take away.
The Christian would remind you that everything you possess belongs to God and always will. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away.
That does not mean to suffer for the sake of suffering. There is nothing noble or grandiose about pointless pain. The correct question to ask yourself is whether the thing you are sacrificing for is worthy of what you are putting on the line.
Sacrifice is putting everything you have on the altar, knowing it might burn to ash, and making the decision of whether it is worthy of the purpose it might bring.
The Safe Decision
I learned this while living in upstate New York near the Adirondack Mountains. It is one of the most beautiful places i have ever lived and the fall season is breathtaking. My Job there was becoming a nightmare. What had started as a good job and career that I thought could grow, became an increasingly hostile environment and I do not mean verbally. My contract was coming to an end and the company i was working for wanted to move me to Missouri. I would be doing the same exact work for the same exact pay. They would pay for the move and I wouldn’t miss a paycheck.
It made sense, and It was safe. Almost everyone told me to take it.
Around that time I called my brother because I wanted advice about buying some rental properties. I had been saving for years and thought real estate might be my next move to grow financially. He ignored the question entirely and instead he told me to quit my job, move to Texas and start doing the same work he was doing. It pissed me off. I wasn’t looking for someone to turn my life upside down. I wanted advice on buying property.
But the conversation opened my eyes to a new opportunity. Do I stay with the company, keep my paycheck, let them pay for me to move, and protect everything that I have been building? Or do i walk away, move to Texas, and attempt to build something that could drain all my savings and leave me empty handed? The overwhelming majority of people told me to choose security but something in me kept telling me to choose Texas. So i went.
Sometimes you have to kill the life that makes logical sense before it kills the life you were capable of living.
The Price
We moved to Texas. I shoved everything we had into a storage unit and started working the next day. We stayed with family to keep expenses down and we borrowed my brother’s car because my truck died right before we had left. I was already down a vehicle and did not have money to buy a new one. I used whatever I had to make it happen because the decision had already been made. There was no point looking back.
Within about eight months, I knew I had made a good decision. Somewhere around five to six months in I was down to the last five grand in my account but I started making the kind of money that I thought impossible to make in that span of time. The money was not the greatest return it was the way that i saw the world and how it works. The experience of this sacrifice changed how I look at security and certainty.
For years I thought I had security and valued it enormously. But security has a price tag. Sometimes you buy security with opportunity. You protect what you have so fiercely that you never discover what you could have built. My sacrifice worked but not every sacrifice does. Sacrifice is not a vending machine that when you put suffering in success comes out. As we all know sometimes the item gets stuck between the glass and we can see it but cannot touch it. This is when you get angry and shake the vending machine real hard until that machine drops what you suffered for. I did not have to do this but some of us have to get fierce.
Some men have laid down their lives for their children to inherit something better and never got to see whether their sacrifice worked. Some people walk away from the vending machine not ever receiving what they suffered for. Others have sacrificed wealth, health, careers, family, comfort, and reputation and even their lives for something they believed was greater than themselves. Some people never get to enjoy the shade of the tree they planted.
A sacrifice is not worthless because you never get to see the reward. Some things are worth suffering for even when someone else gets to receive the shade.
It Was Worth Burning
Eventually, we will be given the decision to hold onto or sacrifice something we do not want to give up. Comfort, money, security, pride, time, plans, and maybe a wonderful life. Maybe even the life we have spent years building. I am not saying to sacrifice all those things just because another road looks harder. Difficulty and suffering does not automatically create meaning and success. There is plenty of pointless suffering in this world.
Sacrifice without purpose is waste. Purpose is what makes the suffering worth carrying. That’s how I have learned to look at stress. Stress tells two stories, either you stress for something that is not worth suffering over or you stress over the things that bring purpose into your life. Learn the difference and learn it fast.
If the suffering serves nothing, change what you can quickly. But if the weight of what you are carrying has a purpose, stop being surprised that it is heavy and brings complications.
Get uncomfortable. Let the stress come. Carry the weight and know why you carry it.
Looking back, I sacrificed a secure life for an uncertain one. Thankfully, I got to see that decision pay off. But the lesson I learned was not that taking risks makes you successful. I could never grab hold of something greater without releasing what i already had. You cannot keep everything.
Eventually something has to go into the fire. So when that moment comes, make damn sure what you are sacrificing is worth the cost. Then quit looking at the sacrifice and move forward.
A man can sacrifice, and the gain from that sacrifice can be seen for thousands of years. A man can sacrifice and die never knowing what his sacrifice created. You may never live long enough to see what your suffering built, who it changed, or how far its impact reached. Make sure your sacrifice has purpose.
Don’t Sacrifice because you hate what you are leaving behind. Sacrifice for the cause of something worth potentially more than what you are giving up.
A life filled with greater purpose will always require a greater sacrifice.
Beautiful!